she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
