it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
he told me I talked like a deaf person
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
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