Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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