He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
