The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
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ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
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I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.