I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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