It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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