haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize