Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
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