How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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