You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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