you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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