I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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