that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times