just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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