Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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