I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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