also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
You took a bar mat shot.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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