but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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