You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize