I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Randomize
