the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Floor bacon is actually really good
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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