Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
