It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
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I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
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Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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