Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
