I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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