omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
