someone threw a dead crab at me
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
