you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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