I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
