So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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