Already got asked if we're dating
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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