It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I checked into jail on foursquare
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
