But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
