There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
