I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
tell me about the eggs
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