but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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