are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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