So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
