thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize