Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
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