that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
