Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.

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  (508): i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker. http://tfl.nu/03y7
  Replies (5) Good night (778) Bad night (866)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.

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  (727): In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up. http://tfl.nu/1vdz
  Replies (22) Good night (1069) Bad night (4462)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.

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  (215): I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did. http://tfl.nu/l0um
  Replies (22) Good night (3785) Bad night (979)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music

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  (206): And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music http://tfl.nu/tzqo
  Replies (7) Good night (2879) Bad night (1365)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.

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  (250): Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame. http://tfl.nu/gc6a
  Replies (11) Good night (1608) Bad night (537)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"

  (1-512): View more from Texas

  Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.

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  (512): Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??" (1-512): Yeah no more flaming everclear shots. http://tfl.nu/vc2f
  Replies (11) Good night (940) Bad night (1547)
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  (28): View more from

  so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.

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  (28): so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours. http://tfl.nu/gbso
  Replies (15) Good night (560) Bad night (1377)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.

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  (847): Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos. http://tfl.nu/unc3
  Replies (16) Good night (1871) Bad night (577)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.

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  (513): If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy. http://tfl.nu/099u
  Replies (7) Good night (1110) Bad night (458)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.

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  (281): Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy. http://tfl.nu/smj8
  Replies (2) Good night (406) Bad night (683)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  From one hot mess to another... Get it together.

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  (706): From one hot mess to another... Get it together. http://tfl.nu/0xgv
  Replies (1) Good night (756) Bad night (347)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?

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  (902): Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport? http://tfl.nu/84nt
  Replies (3) Good night (441) Bad night (292)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..

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  (802): Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious.. http://tfl.nu/rub0
  Replies (3) Good night (430) Bad night (494)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.

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  (512): I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol. http://tfl.nu/ap1u
  Replies (2) Good night (227) Bad night (495)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.

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  (+44): The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking. http://tfl.nu/xzp9
  Replies (0) Good night (164) Bad night (68)

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