He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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