DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
