Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak

  (1-323): View more from California

  I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole

  (1-323): View more from California

  She's blonde

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak (1-323): I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole (1-323): She's blonde http://tfl.nu/vvom
  Replies (6) Good night (1889) Bad night (934)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check. http://tfl.nu/gtrd
  Replies (35) Good night (4792) Bad night (740)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right? http://tfl.nu/pq1k
  Replies (8) Good night (4160) Bad night (787)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent. http://tfl.nu/g68o
  Replies (7) Good night (1585) Bad night (3884)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day. http://tfl.nu/blek
  Replies (4) Good night (3204) Bad night (1005)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house? http://tfl.nu/eww0
  Replies (5) Good night (2575) Bad night (1112)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened. http://tfl.nu/f3s1
  Replies (4) Good night (2305) Bad night (1213)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (931): THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING http://tfl.nu/7m50
  Replies (29) Good night (4123) Bad night (1043)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Almost there.

  (1-402): View more from Nebraska

  define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Almost there. (1-402): define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway. http://tfl.nu/xjed
  Replies (1) Good night (1775) Bad night (445)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird.... http://tfl.nu/u9p7
  Replies (1) Good night (340) Bad night (617)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks. http://tfl.nu/v5vh
  Replies (4) Good night (464) Bad night (328)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex http://tfl.nu/xxak
  Replies (1) Good night (1124) Bad night (277)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard http://tfl.nu/t1kd
  Replies (3) Good night (400) Bad night (557)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate. http://tfl.nu/uh2w
  Replies (3) Good night (463) Bad night (188)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside. http://tfl.nu/4ddk
  Replies (5) Good night (543) Bad night (172)

Randomize