Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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