Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Vodka?
Forever.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
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