are you still at the devil's house?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Randomize
