Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
