is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
